Doom Initial Misgivings
by M.Dernoncourt
Summary: Deep in Phobos base, the Marine was raising hell with it's minions, but while he was having fun on that moon a fellow Army Private was experienceing the same thing on the Deimos base.


Doom: Initial Misgivings Prologue - Even Hell Started Somewhere  
  
There are many things people take for granted that they do not even realize. We breathe, eat, and sleep without any type of hindrance most of the time. If there is a problem usually we can deal with it. It is not like something is watching us eat, making sure we are consuming what we are supposed. No one is there watching us breathe, regulating the amount of Nitrogen and Oxygen getting to our lungs. No one is watching us as we sleep, planning on how to best kill us in our peaceful, yet vulnerable, state.  
  
I took these things for granted once, but I have since learned to enjoy every moment of my existence. It is not because I am a tree-hugging faggot like those queers over in Berkeley. I learned what it was like to have creatures hunting you mercilessly and relentlessly. Never stopping for sleep themselves and an infinite amount of them coming from the very depths of Hell. There was hardly anything I could do; there was hardly a thing they would allow me to do. I do not mean being able to do nothing like in a jail where you have people making sure you aren't a problem. I am talking about things that are looking for you that want to take you out. The not eating and the like was a mere side effect from paranoia and fear.  
  
Even now, long away from the horrors once seen with my own eyes, I still have problems sleeping. The meager amount of sleep I get is consumed with visions of bloodthirsty demons, wreathed in an ebony flame, coming to try and get me. My buddies and co-workers that already had died haunt the hours I lay awake just as mercilessly. I escaped the vile darkness, but at what cost? I am a broken shell of my former self. I can barely eat without puking my food up. Sleep is tainted by aforementioned nightmares too horrible to bear. Any time I hear a loud noise; I shout and dive for cover trying to shoot in the direction with a sidearm that was not there. I have been scarred forever, and I do not think I will be the only one.  
  
I need to get this off my chest before I end up killing myself. I think about it everyday now; it is amazing how one day you could see one thing as pure foolishness and the next day it is seen as your only means of escape. Escape from dreams. Escape from visions. Escape from myself. But I cannot let myself die without some person knowing about what happened up there. You'll think I am crazy, but I wouldn't hold that against you. I am still wondering if I am still crazy myself. The scars, the memories, the body bags, they are all proof that what I said could have happened. They don't believe me. The Military covered it up, not wanting us to know the truth. Not that I blame them, for I saw the events and I wished I had never been born.  
  
I guess a small explanation about myself is in order. I am Private First Class John Caross from the United States Army. Before I signed up, I was a typical boy. I joined at 21, right after I finished two years at a community college. It wasn't enough to score me a Commission, but you cannot always win. I went to basic training and passed top of my class. Afterwards I was sent for training to become a Military Police, better known as M.P. I was not too thrilled about being volunteered for this, so I argued with my Commanding Officer, needless to say it was not pleasant. He got pissed with me, but in his anger he slipped something about the UAC.  
  
The UAC is short for Union Aerospace Corporation. In the beginning it was a small aeronautics company, but around twenty years ago it was one of the largest corporations in the world. They shifted to military research and space colonization after some convincing from the Defense Department and several trillion dollars. They headed a joint colonization effort on the Moon with Sony, but through many military ties they managed to have sole manufacturing of facilities on Mars and it's two moons Phobos and Deimos. The planet proper was the site of the civilian colonization effort, but the moons were military use only. That's where it all began.  
  
I signed up for UAC duty thinking it would be better than checking snot- nosed general's bed for boogie-men. I stepped into the UAC/Army recruiting center and volunteered to server a whole four years. It had great benefits including a four thousand signing bonus, a new Laptop computer, and all the wonderful facilities offered to Military personnel. I was now officially in the UAC guard staff. It was a low, grunt level job, but it gave me a chance to do what many would die to do. Of course we needed to qualify physically for it, but luckily I passed. Well, with some help from a friend in the Medical staff I did, but we do not have to go into that. I don't think of it of cheating, more like an open-notes test. The next week I was on the shuttle Solaris 7 heading towards the moon of Deimos. There were about a hundred of us grunts in that particular ship, each of us being allotted a nice 2x7x2 area of bedding. We were like sardines in a can. The trip took a miserable three weeks and we were all extremely happy to finally be out of the small, enclosed space. We walked into the landing bay and gasped: the entire bay was a giant plastic dome, enabling us to see the heavens beyond. Mars' surface and Phobos were visible clearly from this vantage point. Grudgingly we all went into the next room.  
  
Registration was much like it was at school: there was a roll call, bedding assignments, and then a small speech about us being part of the UAC family, or some crap like that. Afterwards they had some people show us to our rooms. We had two to a room, which were quite spacious. We had a bunk, a dresser, and seven fresh uniforms per person. As we entered our rooms ten of our fellows were pulled aside by a UAC representative and taken somewhere else. It was only until later that we found out they were assigned to the Elite Forces Unit, the only unit with assault rifles. Every man was assigned a Glock 18 and two clips of ammunition. Kinda sucked, but what could possibly hurt us up here?  
  
Well, I guess that's all the background you need. We were there for a few months before everything went to Hell. Enough time to learn the layout of the base and get to know the people. Marc, Jim, and Brian were all members of my squad. I was in charge of them, but they were friends more than subordinates. Of all of my men, I was the only one with minimal training. Most of the men actually just happened to fit the requirement when it came to physical fitness. They all had some useful skill, however, like computers or mechanical ingenuity. We had fun doing our job, however boring it could be. We had so much fun we sometimes got in trouble. I swear, they wanted that research station as uptight as those military assholes I tried so hard to leave behind me.  
  
We were not allowed to have any family with us, so the ones without a spouse had to spend the nights cold and alone. There were girls, sure, but they worked in the office or the labs. I was not much for going into the offices because all of the UAC supervisors were there. I did manage to see people from the lab from time to time. I even got to know one of them: Doctor Elanna Mitchell. She was about five-foot nine; had long, brown hair, and a body that would boil your blood. Sure, I instantly fell for her looks, but I also ended up getting to know her personality. We were not allowed to have and people as "more-than-friends" so we had to keep it somewhat secret. We were not going out per se, but we did have energy. We spent a lot of time together: nights, weekends, holidays, you name it. I really loved her. You could actually say she was the first love of my life, and more than likely the only.  
  
Things never do last. I remember hearing in school that Sol, our sun, would supernova in a few billion years, or something like that, and kill us all. But that was so far away, humanity just would not care. Humans will not even be around by then, most likely. The only real threat had been nuclear war and global warming, but we already found ways to stem each of those. Anti-missile batteries were standard all over the world, as was Atmosphere Element Modifiers, AEMs for short. Humans were doing great in all respects. No wars, tons of economic boosts, space colonies being created, and we were the master of it all. We never though that it could be challenged and beaten so easily.  
  
It started during my squads shift that day. I had just gotten off the night shift for a friend who couldn't do his because of an illness, so went strait to my bunk. I was in no mood for a triple shift, thank you for asking. But I still remember that day all too well, even if I did not experience the beginnings of it. It was so horrible a shock; I have never really recovered from the sight of it. I replay that day in my dreams the most. Of all that happened, the first hours were far worse than anything you could imagine. If there was only some way to make the pain go away. If only I had died there, never having to worry about anything again. No, death at their hands would be worse than diving into a pool of razor-sharp glass naked. Now that I think about it, the result would be the same in the end: me ripped apart. 


End file.
